The Garbage Man

Late last night I'm sitting on the couch while Chris takes Cally for her final walk of the night. I hear this strange noise, like someone is scooting a box across the floor. It continues and I finally see Cally slowly and pathetically walking towards me while dragging her leash behind her. Chris is nowhere to be seen. Keep in mind it's like after 11pm. Suddenly the front door swings open and all I see is the black silhouette of a man holding a giant judo-like stick and the moonlight in the background. Kinda creepy.
"DEYA! There is something in our garbage!" Exhale. The creepy figure with the weapon is Chris.
"And by something you mean...?"
"So Cally and I were walking and I heard a noise coming from our garbage and looked to see the lid slowly closing. So I ran over and yelled, 'I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE! COME OUT! GET OUT OF MY GARBAGE!' But the dude wouldn't come out. So I grabbed this walking stick and started beating on the side of the can while I was yelling at him to come out. So I finally flipped up the lid and shoved the stick inside to poke him and he grabbed the stick and started pulling on it back! But I don't think it's a person anymore because it's too small. I could get the stick in there too far."
At this point I'm putting on my shoes knowing full well how this is about to go down and wishing the battery for our video camera was charged. So we both go around to the garbage can, flip the lid back and I step up to the can (insert yelled warnings from Chris about vicious attacks that are about to occur). Two little black eyes look up at me. "Hey Mr. Raccoon. I would really appreciate if you could please go through someone else's garbage and not ours. Thanks." I stepped back, he calmly climbed out and ran away.
I don't know why our house is such a target for wildlife, but we do enjoy all the blogging material it provides!

The Football Cake

This is for you mom...I had to hold Jillian's clothes hostage for the pics. :) Here is Eric's bday cake from Memorial Day. He wanted a football cake. It slid a little in the car (Happy turned out more demented than "happy"), but turned out pretty well.

So.....we have a new pet

That was the only text to an email I received on Friday morning at work from Chris. As many of you know, I tend to take in stray animals (learned it from you Mom and Dad!) so Chris and I constantly battle over little furry creatures I find lost in our yard. So I'm expecting maybe a puppy. He hates cats, so I knew that probably wasn't it, unless it was an itty, bitty baby kitten. So imagine my surprise when he starts discussing a lizard. Not just any lizard, but "Zeus". He had named it Zeus due to its "size and rileyness". Cally was trying to help find sneaky Zeus but was finally deterred by some thunder and Chris lost his scout. That was 3 days ago and the last time we saw Zeus. We keep hearing odd noises and assuming it was him. We even unscrewed the vent on the A/C but alas, no Zeus. Early this morning, we finally found him on the leg of the dinning room table- no thanks to the bloodhound. Apparently we didn't pay for the warranty on her sniffer. It took us about 20 minutes to catch poor Zeus as he kept running over my bare feet and legs. It tickled so much I would start laughing and lose focus. Once we'd find him, he would disappear. It was as if he borrowed Harry Potter's invisibility cloak or something. Maybe he was apparating to the other side of the room. After his weekend getaway in the Graham Bed n' Breakfast, Zeus was thankfully returned to the wild.

Insight into the Mind of My Husband

So when Chris is out of town, we completely use and abuse our cell phone family plan. I would like to shake the hand of whoever thought of that. Anyway, this last trip, Chris was away during one of our best friend's bday and naturally I was in charge of the cake (pictures to come). As I was excitedly describing Chris over the phone what kind of cake I was making, the following conversation ensued:

C: How come you never make me a cake?
D: Because when it's your birthday or any other special occasion that warrants a cake and I ask you what you want, you say 'Dairy Queen Ice Cream Cake'
C: That's because it's yummy. Can't you make that?
D: No. And gross.
C: Well, couldn't you make me one of your cakes to celebrate a non-special occasion? Like me being married to you every day. We could have a cake that celebrates all my patience and tolerance.
D: Patience and tolerance?
C: Yeah! A Patience and Tolerance Cake!
D: Well then how come you've never made me a cake for all of my patience and tolerance?
C: Honey, all that is required to be married to me is Happiness and Joy!

I think I've finally met someone who can out argue me! I was laughing so hard by the end at his seriousness. We will keep you posted on the patience/tolerance/happiness/joy cake. :)

Why I'm a Wii-tard

I've never been good at video games. I think I was in first grade when we begged our parents for a Nintendo ES. I was never coordinated enough to catch up with Lake in Super Mario Bros to ever save the princess so I kept to Duck Hunt. Apparently sitting 2 ft away from the screen is cheating. Even then, I would become frustrated at the laughing dog.

A few years later my interest was renewed when I received the gift of a Barbie Nintendo game. This is sadly the only game we (oh yes Lake, I am calling you out) could never beat. We could dodge the flying fashion accessories, but the dang fountains at the mall got ya every time. I think Lake made it to the 3rd level once, but I never did make it to my dream date with Ken.

I think my problem was the fact that I didn't want to push the buttons on the controller so much as I wanted to "steer" the controller in the direction I wanted it to go. Oh, and yell at it when that didn't happen. 18 years later, someone finally read my mind and invented the Wii. I don't have to push all the buttons to go in directions, I get to move the controller! MarioKart finally has a wheel controller- the way I believe it was always "nintended" to. Sure I over-correct my pink kart (no Chris-not like in real life) and fall off Rainbow Road everytime, but I'm tons better than I used to be.

So what's my point? The point is, the stupid Wii is dangerous. Yes, it fights childhood obesity. Yes, it helps the elderly with physical therapy. Yes, it solved my own personal video gaming issues. But dangit, did the stupid bowling and tennis games have to make me sprain my knee?!?!? I popped it further at work today, so now it's all swollen. Enjoy the pic of my leg here at work today. Yes, that is ice duct-taped to my pants. Everyone there had a good laugh, you might as well share in the fun.

House Chris-tening

We had to have our first dinner party and we figured what better way than with a set of grandparents, our two best friends and two dogs? I don't know which was more exiting:

- having LOTS of counter space to cook and prep with
- not having to move the table into the living room so that we could fit 6 people in the dinning room
- or Muffin puking on the new couch :) Gotta love microfiber- it came out!!!!!!!

New Neighbors

We live on the corner, so we only have one next door neighbor. We don't know their names, but they are....how to say....good for blog postings? The dad is probably my parent's age and has met both of our fathers. As my dad worded it, "He's a good ole boy from the South". He actually tried to talk us out of buying our house because "others" were moving into the neighborhood, "you know, not of our kinfolk." You can read into that however you would like. He is very congenial to us. We can always count on him coming out of the house in his wife-beater and stonewashed jeans which is extremely complimentary to the robust shape and ruddy complexion.

Today we learned he has two daughters. The oldest, about our age, came out while Chris was power-washing the house. Being the friendly guy he is, he shouted hello. She gave a very condescending "hey" back. Trying to make friends, Chris pushed the conversation further. Noticing she was rather dressed up for 10am he asked, "Going somewhere fancy?"
"No. Just out."
"Okay." At this point Chris was going to let it go. But apparently she was not done with her snippity tone:
"So, you've been doing a lot of work for them?"
"uh, yeah?"
"That's good. The last people didn't really keep it up very well. I'm glad to see they hired someone to take care of the place."
Chris never did tell her he was man enough to work on his own house.

And for our last new neighbor, here is a picture of Mr. Long who we met at the park tonight. We apologize for the graininess, but it was taken on a cell phone!